Sunday, November 4, 2007

MY First weekend On my diet..





Well I think I have done AWSOME, My mom wrote me a letter of concern about my diet and I responded, I would LIke to show EVERYONE how strong this is making me, I felt better having someone to listen to me, its my true feelings from my heart..




This is her letter:





you have to be good to yourself-don't beat yourself up if it does not go as fast as you want it to- the slower you lose it, the longer it will stay off-I am glad you are doing good on it- just be careful not to put your body in a lot of stress-you will feel better with less weight and feel better about yourself- you will feel beau-ty-full...........I loved that bar thing you gave me-I eat one of those kinds of things about 9-10 every morning- or some kind of snack-hunger strikes about that time-I love the energy bars and some of them seem to work well- kinda expensive though- I love the Ensure but, it is real high in calories but....... it is to help one maintain their weight or help gain weight-I don't need them anymore-menopause is taking care of all of that-you do not want to be over weight when you get to menopause age-----because it causes you to gain then one would really be in a mess- to much fat around the heart causes a lot of problems---KILLS
I get worried when I see one getting bigger&bigger because I know how Mom had to suffer with all of that mess-she was miserable- but she had high blood pressure so they would not let her have diet meds plus she was very diabetic- was going to have to go on the shots, but died the month before the shots were to start- so just be careful with all that whole situation-




MY Response:



I am not losing weight to be "Skinny" I am losing weight to feel better, I have gain and gained and it has gotten out of control, I am training my self that everything is not fee game ( Snacks) I should have started this long ago but, it is a Hard and depression to start...I have done great, its kind of like an drug addict, you have to take it one day at a time, and that's the way I am looking at it. I guess the Pills did give me a jump start but they work great and assist in helping me deal with the "hunger" part of it, I have NO systems from them EXCEPT I feel better, like I have more energy...and they work in controlling the Food Cravings..I am diabetic and don't need ANYTHING sweet anyway and what I like about them is they STOP COMPLETELY the craving for SWEET foods....That's what I needed...Now that I am "paying for the pills, I try harder because you don't wanna waste money. I am getting my calories in by drinking slim fast, I have to MAKE myself eat sometimes but that's good because I eat less in portion size...you know ..LIKE OK for example : I use to go to McDonalds couldn't help but get a fry if nothing else BUT now...Michael ate there the other night and I got NOTHING I came home and ate a soup..I felt SOOOO much better...Then another example we went to Shoneys Friday night, Michael OF COURSE got the bar, JUST as I ALWAYS did BUT instead..I got the Veggie bar and ate only 3 veggies in small portions and ate a Healthy small ( VERY lil NON fat Dressing ) salad..soo see..I am NOT starving myself, just eating Healthier and paying attention to details that I normally don't...I know people are against The medication to help but in my mind, which that is all it is...I NEED assistance with then med's, and it is working, Its making Me "think" before just grabbing ONE LIL BITE that normally I would think wouldn't count. I am 32 and 5'1 and weigh 180, thats NOT healthy...see what I mean..

I get NO support from Michael at all, BUT I don't care what he says..I am doing this and him not giving me support makes me want it more because it shows me he don't want me to be happy and I will do what it takes to be Happy and Healthy. If he don't want me to have it I will do it no matter what lol...sooo That's the story on that, I am keeping an online food journal, If anyone is interested in the outcome...I have friends online going through the same thing..so that helps...Yeah it would be easier if I had people to in courage me BUT I am not doing t for People I am doing it for me and to help me have a brighter future and not be so down on myself...I DO still have BAD days where I feel like I can't do it BUT, I will deal with it ONE day at a time.

I just want HEATHY habits ya know...Like when I stop taking the medication, which I will I want to eat the same as I am now so I can KEEP the weight off...

Now see your lil girl is growing up..I promise..

Love U and Hope we get out and do something this weekend...

Jenna




I Think I said everything I wanted to say...Friday I done GREAT even after I left work..We went to Shoneys and Even though I normally get the Bar, I decided against it and got a salad and Veggies, I Drank TWO HUGE glasses of water with lemon and called it a night..NOW Saturday I don't think I wold call this GOOD BUT, I Was not hungry all day, I MADE myself eat a half a soup...SOO Thats not good that i did not get my nutritons in but last night I decided that I can't do that so i went to walmart and bought Two baoxes of Slim Fast and some nutrition Bars that are only 90 calories and some yogert, that way when I am NOT hungry and I have to make myself eat, It will be something that will be nurtitious and all that...soo That was Saturday, it is now Earily Sunday morning, I ave took my medicine and I am not hungry so I have not ate...

As far as symptions, I have not really had any, I do have dry mouth alot but that makes you drink more water and I did sleep last night sooo...I guess I can say so far GOOD things

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