Can't talk

I am miserable sick and can hardly talk and when I do I feel like I wanna cry :( I am seriously sick....OK I am done :) I don't even feel like talking on here

OK IMPORTANT UPDATE!!!

I have lost not 7 BUT 11 pounds, I just re counted!!!!! OMGGG I am sooo excited!!!!! I did not realize I had lost that much but I have lost a total of 23 pounds since 10/30/2007! I am proud of me....wow! I will be skinny for you know it! ha ha

Down 7 Pounds!!!

Hello, wow I am really behind on my journal, I am usually so good about these things but as you see I am slacking...I have had so much going on BUT In the middle of it all..I went to the Dr and I am down 7 more pounds!!! wow I am soo excited..for those of you that aren't keeping up...I have lost a total of 23 sticks of butter so far! Wow I am just amazed and very proud of myself for this! I mean I never thought I had the will power to do it but, I am! And I will continue to keep on until I reach my goal weight, no matter who trys to stop it...I went to our office party at my bosses house and wow, It was great fun...we done Gag gifts and played "dirty" santa..Its funny I hate ELVIS and ended up with some elvis playing cards and a dart thing where you throw pigs lol it was soo funny..I have some pictures to share of course..Ok This was the food and YES I did eat everything that was there even chips BUT REMEMBER..its christmas :) This is me & a Co worker, Heather. I think I look so huge in this picture! I mean just HUGEEEEEE ok I am over that now lol but, I do feel like I look huge..Lord shes preggy and I look bigger then her!!!

Ok Now for other news, I went on my trip..it was kind of and anniversary thingy..Ok I have some pictures of me ...I LOVEEEE Christmas and believe it or not this was a great time..We went to the lodge...Ice skating and playing in the snow..wow I love the lodge!!!! OK OK I will get to the pictures already..lol OKOK This is ME In the snow!!! Yeahh I Loved it loved it loved it! OK NOWWW I look skinny!!!!!and I just had to turn a lil sideways so you could see I lost weight :) I told you I was having a blast!!!! I sure feel it today too, I am sooo sick and sore and MISERABLE!!!!! I took a hand full of meds to turn to come to work and maintain! Now as for how things went with my husband and I, well Ok after I returned..He decided I should be doing something with him..hummm ok whatever anyway so we went ice skating in Gatlinburg and looked at lights..of course I didn't get a gift, not even a card But hey...I would have more surprised if he got one ya know...I just tired to have a good day off...We did take a picture togather and I think I look sooo different in it... I just kept staring at it...couldn't believe my face looked so small or something lol...you know I have to share that one....I got a e-mail from my blog the other day from a girl named michelle, I was like wow how nice it was to know someone read and it touched them enough to write me...it was a wonderful feeling Ok I gotta run...But I am here :)

Wow BUSY shopping weekend!

Christmas shopping was...a challege! I spent my whole weekend not even thinking about food but thinking of shopping and trying to get things in order for Christmas dinner..I am excited for people to get there gifts. I Know what some things that my mom got me are...A weight scale! YES what I wanted...& a steamer lol YESSSSSSSSS just some of the things I was wishin for he he, I just happen to show up before she got them wrapped! ha ha While shopping ran into an ex...ekkkk was not that happy to see them...left on bad terms and Honestly glad its been OVER ha ha I am glad that I had lost some weight before I seen them! ha ha ANYWAY..Today is my anniversary, not that I will get anything BUT it is...We were married in Georgia in a small town called Blueridge, GA Was I happy?? Now that I look back..not really! Sad to say but I think I mostly married because I felt like nobody else would have me..I didn't wanna die alone but..Lil did I know the complete hell I would go through, the late nights crying, the fighting and fussing. The Physical & Mental abuse..and the Emotional roller coaster I would be on! I can not remember a time in our marriage that I can say I "enjoyed" I mean don't get me wrong I have had good and bad days, some days he and I have gotten along, I know I loved him so much in the beginning but, after so many restless nights the love died. I have some scars emotionallt from him that I don't forgive and thats hard. I know that there is life out there and my brused heart will heal in time...I should have held on to my pride, but I guess he got what he wanted..I have few friends and I have shut out many over him. I am not sure, but I think Time can heal a heart..One day I will be able to hold my head up and feel strong.

Managed my eating pretty well considering the stress I have been under I hope that Christmas don't blow it..

Finally Friday!!!

Wow it is FINALLY friday boyyy I have waited all week for Friday to come lol Ok so I done Great at eating today and done just BAD at drinking water, I am having a hard time in that department! Last night I DID eat Ham!!!! I couldn't help it and it was sooo Good...you have to enjoy yourself sometimes...well This week is going to be a VERY VERY busy week, My anniversary is Monday, I have a Christmas party that day and I am taking off Tuesday for Vaction day..Then I have an Dr oppintment and another appointment on Wedesday and WOW its going to be a CRAZYYY week! Its NUTS! I have felt fine but my LIp hurts, I have a Fever Blister :(

Today ~ Better!

Today has been much better, I have mainly played online most of the day, trying to shop for good deals, ran accross a couple of them for Christmas..Eating Ok Yesterday for lunch I had a piece of grilled chicken and a small healthy salad..ate a rice cake for a snack and for dinner umm let me think..I went to my Mother in laws and ate some Ham & I think a couple of bites of a potato... not very good dinner but I know I did not go over my calories yesterday, This morning for breakfast I ate a Rice cake. I got the two books I wanted the other day called "the biggest Loser workout and diet book" and I bought the calorie counter. Its a pretty interesting book so far. For some reason I feel so FAT and huge and was feeling like I had maybe lost some more weight but now, I just don't see it, I think I might have gotten depressed when I went to try on my old jeans and they fit :( I didn't want them to fit...It was SAD But, the next day I made a point to wear the smaller ones that I can fit in as well..My dogs Christmas pictures turned out so well that I made a scrap book of them, and got a copy of all of them...Here is a couple of them..See I told you they are sooo pretty, I have more that have all three of them but I am at work and this is a few I put on for my screensaver.

Michael has not been that bad lately. My anniversary is Monday..Not sure what that day will bring just yet, I know next week will be a busy week..at work very lil but Monday I an attending a party at my boss's house and then taking a vaction day tuesday..wed. is my monthly appointment with Julie and Thursday is WEIGH IN!! so we will see how I deal with all that stress and eating right as well..Might be hard but I need to stay in control of myself..Thats important to me...Well Thats a small recap of me and my crazy life...

OK, It was a bad day...

Ok so Yesterday and the day beofr was just BAD, I mean I can't express how bad I felt yesterday, I was completely miserable and so sleepy, I am not sure what I took that made me so sleepy but it was miserable and I had such a long day, was at work all day then had class so It was bad...eating was ok I guess, I did have to eat a snack last night because I got hungry but I was good and ate egg beaters, I love them anyway...I have gotten so bad about logging food but I can assure you I am doing ..OK maybe not great, my main problem is not eating enough...I am trying to get better. Hope to have lost some weight this month, we will see...